Re-Turn

Long time, no see! I’m popping in to say, “hello” and to let you know what’s going on in my world of practical spirituality. It’s been just over two weeks and my life has been a whirlwind that, honestly, came out of nowhere. Chaos is not random, it is a way that random things come together and find a new pattern.

I recently wrote about how the unexpected death of my companion, Shai, suddenly blew open the doors of opportunity for me. And, if a door opens, I feel it’s important for me to step up – at least to the threshold – and if I sense it’s a door that leads me closer to my heart, I step through. Sometimes it’s a place to land for a while, sometimes it’s just a short journey to the next door. Either way, it’s good … although not always easy.

My work as a writing consultant had dried up in the late winter and early spring and suddenly work came pouring through. Ah, gratitude for something to keep my mind occupied while my heart is healing. And right on the heels of that work came an opportunity to work with a start up organization with a goal of creating community wealth in underserved parts of the world. The desire and ingenuity is there – and we bring education, skills, and access to capital. It is amazing to work with a team of dedicated people from all over the world. My end goal is to bring it here, to the place I’ve made my home, and to see how we can flourish in the high, dry desert.

And those are not the only two ventures that are on my plate. I’m still exploring some other offers that have shown up. I’m still exploring some of the avenues that are calling to me. It’s exciting and yes, it’s a whirlwind.


But, what was missing was the time to return to the heart/soul of me. To this blog, to the practical tools of being a mystic – meditation, breath, writing, chanting – all those gentle activities that return me to my center. The desire was rising and this evening I am able to put everything else aside to be with you, my readers.

I came with a question this evening: what purpose can this blog serve for me and for you.

5 of Wands, 7 of Pentacles, King of Pentacles

The first card, 5 of Wands, set the stage – conflicting desires. Yes, there were all sorts of people batting at me for my attention and my work – and I entered into the fray willingly. I’ve been learning to set my boundaries with others that are healthy and productive for us all. And, there were all sorts of inner desires batting at me as well, “pay attention to this! no! pay attention to that! no!! pay attention to something else entirely!!!” I know that unless I set boundaries with myself, for myself, I’ll never be able to do it with others.

As I turned my attention back to Emma Deva, I wondered, after all this time tilling the soil of the blog, what was really growing? Was it worth it? For me? For you? I paused and considered.

One of the things I love about the 7 of Pentacles is how it resembles the 4 of Cups. In the cups cards, the person doesn’t notice the new emotional/intuitive opportunity being offered by Spirit. In the 7 of Pentacles, the person doesn’t notice what’s actually growing in the physical world of reality. “Oh no! Where are my grapes?!” says the person while totally ignoring the fact that there are magical, golden pentacles growing instead!

I asked myself, what was I expecting? And then I asked, what is really there? What am I missing that is of true value to me? Grapes are wonderful, refreshing, can be turned into juice or wine … and … you can get grapes almost anywhere. But magical, golden pentacles? Those are more rare.

This blog has reignited the magic in my life. The magic of words creating meaning for me and meaning for you, my readers. The magic of community – the people who shyly ‘like’ my posts, those who leave comments, those who write to me about how my words have offered them the opportunity for insight, change, understanding, and those whose financial generosity help me to continue writing. This is magic.

But, you ask, what about the King of Pentacles. Ah. If I were to choose to become involved again in a committed relationships, it would be with someone who holds the energy of this King. But, that’s not what it holds for me in this reading. Instead, it indicates that this blog allows me to be the energy of the King. Grounded, fruitful, flourishing, and deeply engaged with both the physical and the spiritual energy of Life arising. This is the purpose of the blog: to be the ruler of the unruly energy of the Five of Wands, to trust in the work being done in the 7 of Pentacles, and to rest assured of the abundance of live, love, and peace.

All in all, a good purpose, don’t you think …

And for you? How do you see these three energies playing out in your life at the moment and how do you see them integrating into a pattern of wholeness and flourishing for yourself?


You can support my work on Patreon with an ongoing monthly donation. 
Your patronage will allow me to 
create audio meditations and visualizations, 
hire a writing consultant to help me to craft my next book, and 
teach workshops and classes. 
My big dream is to create a collaborative and integrative healing center. 
I’d love for you to join me in these ventures.

I am also always available to work with clients in my energy medicine and spiritual guidance practice. Please reach out to schedule an appointment.