Night has fallen, candles have been lit, and silence is tucked in around my home with the murmurs of the sleeping dog and the crackling of the fire the only sounds within. Oh, and the keyboard clicking as I consider how to relay this Shabbos message to you.
Although I no longer follow the practices of the religion of my childhood, I still find peace in some of the rituals. The peace of Shabbos and opening the door to the Sabbath bride – the Shekinah.
Some people consider her to be the unnamed partner of the Old Testament’s Jehovah, the invisible and unnamed woman. As were so many in the bible. And others consider her to be the precursor to Jehovah, the ground in which he was realized. And still others consider her to need no association with Jehovah at all. She is the spirit of wisdom, peace, and light that comes to all of us who are willing to enter our own Shabbos.
Today, I went to her with a problem I had encountered. My desire was to take revenge on someone who had acted with a deep lack of integrity and had harmed me, in a small way. I just wanted a small revenge. Anyone would have agreed with me. It was well within my rights. I justified it this way and that way. I knew in my heart that what I really wanted was to cause the same pain that had been imposed upon me. A small pain. Maybe not an eye for an eye, more like an eyelash.
I knew what I wanted was out of my integrity, but it was blossoming in the part of my ego that wanted to protect me. The thing is, my ego can’t protect me against past harm. I can only cause future harm if I let my ego act out on my behalf. In the best of all worlds, my ego only acts within a full alignment with my heart.
So, I went deeper, through a visualization, to the wisdom that I know I carry with me at all times, and I laid out the issue as if I were laying out a tarot reading. “He did this, and I did that, and then he was even worse, so I want to do this.” You know that dialog in your head when you’re trying to justify yourself. I took it to the Shekinah.
She laughed. It was a full-bodied, joy-full laugh. And the cards were swept away in her laughter. “Why,” she asked, “would you want to continue to feed the anger of a bitter, resentful man who will only use that energy to feed his view of the world?”
It was a good question. I didn’t want to feed that bitter anger, I didn’t want to be caught up in that energy stream. I wanted to be free and clear of it, entirely. And if I took the steps toward revenge, I would be tangled up not just in the legal system, but in the energetic karmic system as well.
That was not acceptable to me. The laughter and the question from the Shekinah re-framed the entire situation. For the first time in months, I felt the burden of that business relationship fall away from me and drift into nothingness.
I wonder, if you took a look at some of the situations in your life that are still emotionally charged and you looked at it from a different perspective, what might you free yourself from? Perhaps you could light some candles, find some peace and solitude, and envision yourself in conversation with the Shekinah yourself. What will she advise you to do?